Wednesday, August 15, 2012

Fanfiction Draft

Fanfiction (un-named)

This is my fanfic draft, 
I based it around the movie The Note Book, haven't quite finished the story yet. 

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It’s already been one month since Ally was admitted into hospital.

Ally's memories
of the person she loved most were were slowly starting to fade away

She was trying to
keep it a secret to Noah, but she just could not tolerate the thought of losing the memories her one true love.
I will never forget him, she thought to herself... I loved, love, and will love her only man Noah. She promised to herself that she’ll never forget him for as long as she can and she wrote down his name on her palm in very small print, 'love Noah......'

Noah came 
into the room.
He had just met Ally's doctor. His eyes were red with tears rolling down his eyes but he tried his best to make a smile in front of Ally.

During the consultation with her doctor, Ally couldn’t bear the thought of losing her love but all the negative thoughts vanished into thin air when she saw Noah's face.





Like they had promised, Noah was reading a book for Ally.
Even though he had read the whole book to her 12 times, he always pretended that to her that every reading was his first.
A
s he approached the end of the book slip, Noah thought to himself, 'After I read the next chapter, as always, Ally will end up in tears. '

Ready as always, Noah held a small white handkerchief in his hand for Ally.
When the book finished, Noah held the white handkerchief to wipe Ally’s  tears, and as always Noah was holding Ally's hand.

A quiet knock at the door broke the silence. It was a nurse asking for Noah to go see the doctor.
Noah couldn’t help but feel anxious as to what news the doctor had for him but he reassured Ally that everything was going to be alright before he left for the door.
He stopped in front of the doctor’s room, let out a deep breath and knocked quietly on the door.

"Excuse me."
"Come on in." The doctor replied.

Ally's doctor, Henry offered for Noah to sit down.

"Have a cup of tea and please listen carefully to what I have to say.”

A hundred thoughts started rushing through Noah’s mind at that instant. He tried to keep his hands holding the teacup still but he couldn’t stop the trembling. To his dismay, the grave news soon followed.

"I know this is going to be hard for you but as a doctor I thought it was best to let you know the news as soon as I couldI know that this is going to be hard to accept, so I want you to take it in slowly."
"1 hour ago, I received the final test results of Ally's conditionFrom what I can see here, she may only have three more days left…"

Clang! The teacup shattered across the floor. Henry stopped talking and looked at Noah for a moment. Noah’s eyes were shaking with horror and disbelief.

"Three days?"
"There’s got to be some kind of mistake. How can she only have three days?"

Noah's eyes were becoming redder, and eventually he could not hold the tears in any longer.

"Yes I'm really sorry"

Noah slowly got up from his seat and left the room without saying another word.

Noah walked blankly across the corridor and he reached Ally's room. He looked into a small window on the door. Ally was writing something with a serious face.

He didn't know what to say to her, let alone how to say it or when.
He could only stare at the beautiful face of his lover while a feeling of emptiness swooped over him. He just could not find the right way.
He decided to wipe his tears and he entered the room, putting on his brightest face for Ally.




3 comments:

  1. OMG! WOW is all i can say. Have you considered being a author? that was AWESOME as!! It was written coherently and cohesively and i take my hat off for you Christine. It grabbed my attention and made me kinda cry!

    Kia Manuia, I await anxiously for your final!!

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  2. Beautiful writing. It has a wonderful human quality and has a peaceful feeling to it.
    I really can't see anything wrong with it. Good work!

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  3. I enjoyed your fanfic and thought that this would make another great movie. The way that the sentences flow really assisted. Just some minor grammar checking, e.g.: "tolerate the thought of losing the memories her one true love". I know our drafts are written in a rush sometimes and we tend to overlook minor errors but i think the above sentence could do with the word "of" between "memories" and "her".

    Overall it was enjoyable and almost brought tears to my eyes :)

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